Page 166 - Where the Dream Ends ebook
P. 166

Marc Erdrich


        thought.  He needs  to know I’m here for  him,  that  I won’t
        abandon him, that I’ll get him through this, no matter what.

           “Listen to me,” Harry said. “You’re not going to kill your-
        self.”

           “Okay, then you do it for me,” Ed said, suddenly lifting
        himself up. The abruptness of the suggestion surprised them
        both.

           “You really are crazy?” Harry stammered. He was sorry he
        said it. It was a phrase his mother had always employed against
        her children, and Harry brought it with him into his first mar-
        riage, using it against his wife as if the words didn’t carry any
        real meaning. Harry promised himself that he would banish
        that phrase from his vocabulary, and here he was using it at the
        worst of times, but perhaps when it was most real.

           “You would just be helping to make it easier,” Ed said, as if
        his death was already a fait accompli.

           “Okay, look, this is nuts,” Harry said, standing. He felt his
        anger growing. “You want to be dead, all right I’ll kill you,” he
        said, pointing the gun at Ed. Harry looked menacing, and he
        was yelling. Even Ed was startled by the suddenness of Harry’s
        actions and it was without thinking that he pushed the nozzle
        of the gun away.

           It wasn’t meant for the gun to go off. It wasn’t the way
        Harry planned it. He just wanted  to scare Ed, teach  him a
        lesson. He thought the safety clip was on, that’s what Ed said.
        What did he know? A shot rang out, and the next thing Harry
        knew Ed was slumped on the floor. Harry stood, gun in hand,
        in a state of shock.


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