Page 172 - Where the Dream Ends ebook

Marc Erdrich

In real life, Harry had never seen his mother and father em-
brace.

Youthful, exuberant, full of joy: that was the mother Harry
thought he could have loved, would have liked to love. The
mother he had known was bitter and worn, resentful of her
life, and of her child-bearing years brought to a close when she
was 47 and Harry was born.

* * *
In the tiny Bronx apartment where Harry grew up alongside
three older siblings, it wasn’t easy to avoid confrontations with
his mother whose anger, mostly about never having enough
money, was directed first toward his father who, according to
their mother, was the source of her misery, and if he had been
“a man”, would have found a way to improve her life; and last
toward Harry who, as a change-of-life baby was responsible —
though she assured him of her love — for thwarting any op-
portunity she might have had for fulfillment in her later years.
Her anger moved with her when, after more than two decades
in the same three-room apartment, they bought a house in the
suburbs, fulfilling Harry’s father’s lifelong dream of owning a
home. The dream shattered however, when Harry’s mother,
ever greedy for money, pawned the house for a life insurance
policy and a cash advance.

* * *
Harry’s mother always had a soft spot for insurance sales-
men. When they lived in the Bronx, a certain Mr. Axelrod
would call for tea each week. Those were the days when fam-
ilies made insurance payments in installments — one or two
dollars every week. Mr. Axelrod came armed with actuarial ta-

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